Joys and Pains Pt. 2
Or "When did I give birth and why don't I remember it?"
So I spent the night Thursday with my folks, as did Emmy and Sis1. Friday morning we all got up and found out that Mama had been sick during the night. She said she threw up some three times until she finally just sat beside the tub and fell asleep in the bathroom. Pretty thought, isn't it? So she was pretty much feeling like crap Friday. Sis1 baled after breakfast to go cavorting with her dh who had spent the night at his dad's house. This, of course, left me in charge of the wee one, AKA, Emmy of the Whiney Butt.
As is tradition (or the tradition of the past 6 years) Mama wanted us to decorate the Christmas tree and get all the Christmas decorations out. Daddy hauled all the boxes in and then he vegged in his recliner to supervise aka make me want throw the dang tree at him and say "Here! You do it!" Men! *rolls eyes and growls* Mama and Emmy start putting the tree together while I snap off a few shots on the camera and then I crawl over the mess and help finish up. We get to the middle section of the tree and I find that we're missing a branch. Mama looks all around it, counts the remaining branches and we can't find it so we decide to go ahead and finish the rest of the tree and look for the missing branch later. Daddy, of course, is snarking about how ridiculous it looks with a "gaping hole" in one side. It wasn't gaping. I was just structurally challenged. Sure enough though, once we finished the rest of the branches, I saved the day by finding the missing branch stuck to another branch that was already in the tree. See, I'm not as stupid as I look.
By this time, Nana, as Emmy calls her, was pooped out so Emmy and put the decorations on it. (Well, after mama and strung the lights, that is) Emmy, being closer to the ground and much more enthusiastic than me, hung most of them along the bottom perimeter of the tree so it looks a little wonky but hey. Mama wanted the "kids" to decorate it so she gets what she pays for, right? lol
That debacle done, Emmy and I put Nana to bed (or to couch as the case was) for a nap while she and I escaped outside to play with her remote control truck. (an early Christmas prezzie from her daddy) That lasted all of two minutes when the thing died. We had just charged it up so we just knew something was wrong with it. Then when we went to cut it off we couldn't find the switch. Somehow it had disappeared. Emmy of course freaked out and started the whiney crying routine and Mama woke up and came outside to see what was going on. By this time Emmy's in full squall so we hauled her into the house and I promised her I'd try to fix it. Me in all my brilliance with remote control cars (snicker) pulled out the manual and located the switch and then convinced Emmy to let me hook it back up to the charger. Thankfully, after that she curled up in my lap and went to sleep...as did my arm. That girl's head if HEAVY! lol
Unfortunately, the nap only lasted MAYBE a half an hour thanks to Mama's dumb dog. Someone shot (hopefully a deer) close to the house and went nuts barking. You'd think gunshots weren't a common occurrence around there. *rolls eyes* So she woke up in a slightly better mood and we set out to check on her truck again. It still wouldn't work. Hissy fit ensued at which point I convinced her that her daddy would fix it later because he can fix anything. Apparently she still believes her daddy can move mountains cuz she calmed down. By this time, I'm ready to throw myself against a brick wall so Mama sends me home to feed my dog and pick up Sis1's dog who she had left at my house after her trip to the vet.
Thank God for long quiet rides. I don't think I'd have survived another night of full throttle family time if not for that quick trip home. Oh how my soul longed to curl up on my couch and just take root there for a while. The blessed tranquility it offered. Alas, it wasn't to be. I was expected back at my folks' house because Daddy was grilling steaks and he'd be royally pissed if I failed to show. Plus, I was in Mama's car and she'd likely have sent the law after me. hehehe
When I got back to my folks' house, Mama had Emmy at the dining room table sewing. Well, Mama was sewing. Emmy was pretend sewing on an old machine that doesn't work properly anymore. This, of course, sent Daddy into spasms cuz he at first thought Mama had Emmy on the "good" sewing machine he'd bought Mama for Christmas a couple of years ago. Then he got ill because he was just certain that Emmy would hack her fingers off with the needle or something. Like Mama didn't raise three daughters who all still have all their fingers. *rolls eyes* (Lord, my eyes are getting some good exercise with all this rolling! hehehe)
So supper finally rolls around, the table is cleared of sewing projects and Daddy served up the steaks. Oh. My. Gosh. I wish I could eat that good every night of the week. Daddy may be a pain in the butt a lot of the time but the man....He can cook some steaks. Woooo weeeee! It would have been even more enjoyable if he hadn't set Emmy off into another crying jag. *deep sigh* Now I remember why I hated being a kid. Love the man to death but he can aggravate the hair off a toads back. I'm an adult now so I can snark back and not get into trouble. Emmy, well. Poor child ain't so lucky. And she doesn't understand that he's not being deliberately mean. He honestly thinks he's being funny. But I digress.
After supper, Sis1 escapes to her bedroom and watches TV and Daddy passed out in his recliner leaving me and Nana to clean the kitchen and entertain Emmy. The child is 6-years-old and we STILL had to strip her down after supper to pretreat her clothes to keep the steaksauce from staining. She, of course, had fun running around in her panties while Mama and I finished up in kitchen. We had sent her to her mama to get her pj's on but Sis1 couldn't be bothered. After the third time I sent her back there, she came back with her pj's...not on, mind you. Carrying them. Sis1 had told her to tell ME to dress the kid. I swear I don't remember giving birth.
PJ's finally on, we snuggled in the living room and she went through the JC Penny wishbook and informed me and Nana of all the things she expected us to buy her for . I remember those good old days of flipping dreamily through the wishbook except back in my day it was the Sears wishbook.
Saturday, again, I got to play mommy. By this time I'm looking at my stretch marks and wondering if they didn't come from just being a big girl after all and just what WAS I doing 6 years ago. lol But Mama and Sis1 were heading up to Tupelo for the flea market leaving me in charge of getting Emmy up, fed, showered, dress and off to her Daddy who was still at his dad's house. Thank the good Lord Emmy was in a good mood when she woke up because she chatted happily through her waffle, giggled through her shower and actually let me blow dry her hair without any tears. I think Sis1 could learn some mommy skills from me cuz I discovered that if you let Emmy do it herself for the first little bit she's a lot more amiable to letting you finish it up. hehehe (It's called choosing your battles people. A 6-year-old does NOT have to have perfectly coifed hair. If it's dry and out of her eyes, she--and the rest of the world--really couldn't care less!)
But she was good for her ol' Aunt Jana and we loaded up the car and headed to town and her daddy. She was so happy to see him cuz he had promised to get his buddy to take them up in his airplane. Being a pilot, BIL had been trying to get her go up for quite some time but she had always been to scared before. She had declared to him earlier though that she was ready. So they went. She told me yesterday that she had Fuuuuuuuuun! ;-) BIL was, of course, tickled pink that she had finally caught the "flying bug" as he calls it.
After I dropped her off and made a short (expensive) trip to Wal-Mart, I headed home (thank God) and settled in for the long haul and it may have taken me 3.5 hours, by by George I got my tree up and the house decorated! hehehehe It's so perdy! If I get the film developed soon enough I'll try and post some pics. I don't know which I was happier about. My festively decorated home or the fact that I was finally, blessedly ALONE!! lol And I finally got to sleep in my own darn bed!!! Well, I didn't get to sleep alone. Had to sleep with Sis1's dog which is more like sleeping with an actual person because she's such a bedhog but Woooo Weeeee! I was home! hehehehehe
Sunday I went BACK to my folks house to go to church and then eat lunch. Fried venison steak, cheesy veggies, biscuits and sweet potato pancakes. Yum. Sis1, Emmy and BIL had all stayed with BIL's dad the night before so they skipped church but came for lunch. (Royally pissed Daddy off.) And then after lunch we chatted around the table for a bit and then sent them back to Bama. I stuck around a while longer and watched part of a James Bond movie on TNT. (part of the Thanksgiving Bondathon) It was one with Sean Connery and Yum-O. You know, I've never been a Bond fan and never actually watched a Bond movie before so I was a little awed to find out that Bond isn't so much about a secret agent as it is a secret agent who beds just about anything with breasts. LOL Gracious merciful Heavens. I only watched maybe an hour of the movie but in that our he managed to bed three different women!! :-O I wonder what all manner of STD's he's managed to spread around. Not to mention how many kidletts he's got littered all over three or four continents. hehehehe
The rest of the evening saw me at home cleaning up my kitchen and watching Desperate Housewives. By 9:00 I was happily snoring in bed.
So that was the rest of my weekend. Now. I need some coffee. :-)
So I spent the night Thursday with my folks, as did Emmy and Sis1. Friday morning we all got up and found out that Mama had been sick during the night. She said she threw up some three times until she finally just sat beside the tub and fell asleep in the bathroom. Pretty thought, isn't it? So she was pretty much feeling like crap Friday. Sis1 baled after breakfast to go cavorting with her dh who had spent the night at his dad's house. This, of course, left me in charge of the wee one, AKA, Emmy of the Whiney Butt.
As is tradition (or the tradition of the past 6 years) Mama wanted us to decorate the Christmas tree and get all the Christmas decorations out. Daddy hauled all the boxes in and then he vegged in his recliner to supervise aka make me want throw the dang tree at him and say "Here! You do it!" Men! *rolls eyes and growls* Mama and Emmy start putting the tree together while I snap off a few shots on the camera and then I crawl over the mess and help finish up. We get to the middle section of the tree and I find that we're missing a branch. Mama looks all around it, counts the remaining branches and we can't find it so we decide to go ahead and finish the rest of the tree and look for the missing branch later. Daddy, of course, is snarking about how ridiculous it looks with a "gaping hole" in one side. It wasn't gaping. I was just structurally challenged. Sure enough though, once we finished the rest of the branches, I saved the day by finding the missing branch stuck to another branch that was already in the tree. See, I'm not as stupid as I look.
By this time, Nana, as Emmy calls her, was pooped out so Emmy and put the decorations on it. (Well, after mama and strung the lights, that is) Emmy, being closer to the ground and much more enthusiastic than me, hung most of them along the bottom perimeter of the tree so it looks a little wonky but hey. Mama wanted the "kids" to decorate it so she gets what she pays for, right? lol
That debacle done, Emmy and I put Nana to bed (or to couch as the case was) for a nap while she and I escaped outside to play with her remote control truck. (an early Christmas prezzie from her daddy) That lasted all of two minutes when the thing died. We had just charged it up so we just knew something was wrong with it. Then when we went to cut it off we couldn't find the switch. Somehow it had disappeared. Emmy of course freaked out and started the whiney crying routine and Mama woke up and came outside to see what was going on. By this time Emmy's in full squall so we hauled her into the house and I promised her I'd try to fix it. Me in all my brilliance with remote control cars (snicker) pulled out the manual and located the switch and then convinced Emmy to let me hook it back up to the charger. Thankfully, after that she curled up in my lap and went to sleep...as did my arm. That girl's head if HEAVY! lol
Unfortunately, the nap only lasted MAYBE a half an hour thanks to Mama's dumb dog. Someone shot (hopefully a deer) close to the house and went nuts barking. You'd think gunshots weren't a common occurrence around there. *rolls eyes* So she woke up in a slightly better mood and we set out to check on her truck again. It still wouldn't work. Hissy fit ensued at which point I convinced her that her daddy would fix it later because he can fix anything. Apparently she still believes her daddy can move mountains cuz she calmed down. By this time, I'm ready to throw myself against a brick wall so Mama sends me home to feed my dog and pick up Sis1's dog who she had left at my house after her trip to the vet.
Thank God for long quiet rides. I don't think I'd have survived another night of full throttle family time if not for that quick trip home. Oh how my soul longed to curl up on my couch and just take root there for a while. The blessed tranquility it offered. Alas, it wasn't to be. I was expected back at my folks' house because Daddy was grilling steaks and he'd be royally pissed if I failed to show. Plus, I was in Mama's car and she'd likely have sent the law after me. hehehe
When I got back to my folks' house, Mama had Emmy at the dining room table sewing. Well, Mama was sewing. Emmy was pretend sewing on an old machine that doesn't work properly anymore. This, of course, sent Daddy into spasms cuz he at first thought Mama had Emmy on the "good" sewing machine he'd bought Mama for Christmas a couple of years ago. Then he got ill because he was just certain that Emmy would hack her fingers off with the needle or something. Like Mama didn't raise three daughters who all still have all their fingers. *rolls eyes* (Lord, my eyes are getting some good exercise with all this rolling! hehehe)
So supper finally rolls around, the table is cleared of sewing projects and Daddy served up the steaks. Oh. My. Gosh. I wish I could eat that good every night of the week. Daddy may be a pain in the butt a lot of the time but the man....He can cook some steaks. Woooo weeeee! It would have been even more enjoyable if he hadn't set Emmy off into another crying jag. *deep sigh* Now I remember why I hated being a kid. Love the man to death but he can aggravate the hair off a toads back. I'm an adult now so I can snark back and not get into trouble. Emmy, well. Poor child ain't so lucky. And she doesn't understand that he's not being deliberately mean. He honestly thinks he's being funny. But I digress.
After supper, Sis1 escapes to her bedroom and watches TV and Daddy passed out in his recliner leaving me and Nana to clean the kitchen and entertain Emmy. The child is 6-years-old and we STILL had to strip her down after supper to pretreat her clothes to keep the steaksauce from staining. She, of course, had fun running around in her panties while Mama and I finished up in kitchen. We had sent her to her mama to get her pj's on but Sis1 couldn't be bothered. After the third time I sent her back there, she came back with her pj's...not on, mind you. Carrying them. Sis1 had told her to tell ME to dress the kid. I swear I don't remember giving birth.
PJ's finally on, we snuggled in the living room and she went through the JC Penny wishbook and informed me and Nana of all the things she expected us to buy her for . I remember those good old days of flipping dreamily through the wishbook except back in my day it was the Sears wishbook.
Saturday, again, I got to play mommy. By this time I'm looking at my stretch marks and wondering if they didn't come from just being a big girl after all and just what WAS I doing 6 years ago. lol But Mama and Sis1 were heading up to Tupelo for the flea market leaving me in charge of getting Emmy up, fed, showered, dress and off to her Daddy who was still at his dad's house. Thank the good Lord Emmy was in a good mood when she woke up because she chatted happily through her waffle, giggled through her shower and actually let me blow dry her hair without any tears. I think Sis1 could learn some mommy skills from me cuz I discovered that if you let Emmy do it herself for the first little bit she's a lot more amiable to letting you finish it up. hehehe (It's called choosing your battles people. A 6-year-old does NOT have to have perfectly coifed hair. If it's dry and out of her eyes, she--and the rest of the world--really couldn't care less!)
But she was good for her ol' Aunt Jana and we loaded up the car and headed to town and her daddy. She was so happy to see him cuz he had promised to get his buddy to take them up in his airplane. Being a pilot, BIL had been trying to get her go up for quite some time but she had always been to scared before. She had declared to him earlier though that she was ready. So they went. She told me yesterday that she had Fuuuuuuuuun! ;-) BIL was, of course, tickled pink that she had finally caught the "flying bug" as he calls it.
After I dropped her off and made a short (expensive) trip to Wal-Mart, I headed home (thank God) and settled in for the long haul and it may have taken me 3.5 hours, by by George I got my tree up and the house decorated! hehehehe It's so perdy! If I get the film developed soon enough I'll try and post some pics. I don't know which I was happier about. My festively decorated home or the fact that I was finally, blessedly ALONE!! lol And I finally got to sleep in my own darn bed!!! Well, I didn't get to sleep alone. Had to sleep with Sis1's dog which is more like sleeping with an actual person because she's such a bedhog but Woooo Weeeee! I was home! hehehehehe
Sunday I went BACK to my folks house to go to church and then eat lunch. Fried venison steak, cheesy veggies, biscuits and sweet potato pancakes. Yum. Sis1, Emmy and BIL had all stayed with BIL's dad the night before so they skipped church but came for lunch. (Royally pissed Daddy off.) And then after lunch we chatted around the table for a bit and then sent them back to Bama. I stuck around a while longer and watched part of a James Bond movie on TNT. (part of the Thanksgiving Bondathon) It was one with Sean Connery and Yum-O. You know, I've never been a Bond fan and never actually watched a Bond movie before so I was a little awed to find out that Bond isn't so much about a secret agent as it is a secret agent who beds just about anything with breasts. LOL Gracious merciful Heavens. I only watched maybe an hour of the movie but in that our he managed to bed three different women!! :-O I wonder what all manner of STD's he's managed to spread around. Not to mention how many kidletts he's got littered all over three or four continents. hehehehe
The rest of the evening saw me at home cleaning up my kitchen and watching Desperate Housewives. By 9:00 I was happily snoring in bed.
So that was the rest of my weekend. Now. I need some coffee. :-)
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