CAUTION: Woman In Progress

Is it terribly bad that now that I know the coffee break man has a tattoo I'm totally into him? LOL Just kidding. The tattoo is hot and the conversation is improving (we actually had very little uncomfortable silence today!) I'm still not into him like that. I think I could be if there weren't several factors, namely the other fella, aka preacher man (which freakily enough, they both have the same first name! hehe). But there's also the fact that coffee break man is leaving in May to go off and search the world for the next great dig. (He's an anthropology grad student and is all about the dig.) He has no intention (so far as I can tell) of ever planting roots anywhere and I'm all about roots and not so much on the "while it lasts" thing. Not that he's asked or ever would. He's actually too cool for me. Like, seriously, too cool. Older (by 11 years which isn't a bad thing.), wiser, more experienced, been EVERYWHERE. Done EVERYTHING. Oh, bu...

So come May, I'll have been out high school for ten years. Yes. I know this officially makes me old. The weird thing is, ten years go by and I don't see anyone I graduated with. Well, save for a handful (like four) who attended the same university and worked as student workers at the same library as me. But even still, after college graduation, I've only seen one of them--and that's only because she continued to work at the library while working on her graduate classes. Back in November, our class president and I began work on planning our 10 year reunion. Suddenly, my former classmates are EVERYWHERE! I see them in grocery stores, on campus--even right here in my library! It's insane. And what's worse, I'm not even seeing the people I'd like to see. It's all the ones who wouldn't give me the time of day back in high school and now they're all like, "Hey Jana! Oh, it's so good to see you!" I swear, I didn't think they even k...

I bought a stationary bike yesterday. Wal-Mart had one under $100 and just so happens I'd come into a couple extra bucks. Daddy was feeling generous so he let me borrow his truck to bring it home in. The guy in the store assured me that the things were a breeze to put together. Silly me. I believed him. *sigh* LOL Actually, you know, it wouldn't have been all that hard. Frustrating, sure, but not all that difficult. I'm handy with tools, given proper instruction. Unfortunately, doesn't matter how proficient one is with tools if all the parts necessary for construction aren't in the box. Argh! After much shouting, some flying wrenches and a few errant washers I could see the homestretch. It was erect and starting to resemble a bicycle. It's as I'm installing the handle bars, though, that the problems started. The axle rod isn't fitting right, the nylen nut won't screw on completely and the handles are sliding every which way. Disassembled the handles...

I am such a girl. *sigh* You know, I always prided myself on not changing who I am to suit anyone. What you saw was what you got. If you didn't like it? Poo on you. I never wore make-up. Okay. So I wore make-up a few times. Like prom. And weddings. But never much cared for it on a daily basis. Same thing with my hair. It was just hair. And my skin. Moisturize? Who has time? Grooming? Not me. Shower and shampoo and that's about it. And, you know, brushing my teeth and combing/brushing my hair and applying deodorant. Basics. Even in the early years of noticing boys and getting crushes I never really paid that much attention to my appearance and whether or not I was attractive. More than likely because I never thought I was so what was the point? But I digress. I never put much effort into it. It never occurred to me to. But now. Oh boy, now...*sigh* I'm becoming a mirror hog. I still haven't aspired to full on make-up (who can stand the stuff?) but I take my time doing ...

It's Friday! *swoon* I thought this day would never come. It seems as though I've lived a year within these past 7 days (starting from last Friday, you know. lol) Unfortunately, the week isn't quite as over as I'd prefer it to be. I still have to come in to work for three hours tomorrow. Boo! I suppose I'll survive it, though. It is, after all, a mere three hours. If nothing else, perhaps I'll get some stuff done I've been putting off. I talked to Granny on the phone last night. She said Pa-Paw is doing really great. Said he couldn't sleep well in the bed--or get in and out of his recliner comfortably!--but felt a million times better than he had been. He goes back March 8 to see about having the catheter removed. That's a long way away, it seems, to have to deal with that inconvenience. I suppose, though, that the extra time with give his medication time to begin truly working. Sis2 finally got the job she's been waiting on for MONTHS. Well, she...

I've got good news. Pa-Paw is at home. Came home yesterday. He still has a catheter but otherwise is doing good. Penny was THRILLED to see him. I'll probably wait till Sunday to head over and see him, though.

hehehehehe It's kinda dorky, but I wrote that short story like I teased that I might. Anyone want a peak? Email me. janabelle2002 @ yahoo . com Let me know if you want it as a Word attachment or email text, too. Either way is cool with me. If you request it, remember...IT'S JUST A STORY. Only a very few parts are autobiographical but nothing ya'll don't already know. It's just the fantasy version of events. ;-) And not necessarily how I actually want events to play out. I'm a romance writer, remember? hehehehe Oh, and no. It ain't X-rated or even PG-13.

So I'm practicing my flirting/conversation skills on this guy at work. Perfectly great guy. (Man of the awkward break...remember him?) But, you know, no real attraction on my part. Doubtful on his. He's cute. Just nothin' there for me. The highlight of this morning's venture was me regaling him with tales of dog vomit. Because dog vomit is so sexy. Yes. This, my friends, is the level of conversation skills I have when dealing with the opposite sex. *sigh* Somebody give me a noose so I can put me out of my misery.

I like dialogue . I like to read it and I more than love to write it. But apparently, you have to have some physical cues in there. Bummer. I just love the banter of characters. Nothing tickles me more than getting my characters to have the sort of conversations I can only have with people in my head. Or on the Internet . I'm much lamer in person. Trust me. I usually go away from a conversation mentally slapping my forehead and asking myself, "Could you BE any lamer?" But yeah. I was just over at Jenny Crusie's blog and she's talking about how the first scene with Zelda (the character in the novel she's currently working on) is dialogue heavy and how in the re-writes/second draft she'll have to cut some of it and add some physical cues. I love Crusie novels. I do. So I'm sure she knows what she's talking about. But I love dialogue . How it moves the story along. Seeing the characters interact and relate to each other. I get stuck in physical ...

So you writers all know the term "head hopping?" You know, where the POV switches at random from one character to the other? (I used to be a wretched head hopper, btw, until the illustriously talented Missy Pet pointed out my foibles. I mean, I used to head hop so much that I'd be hopping into heads that weren't even IN THE SCENE. hehehehehe Okay, so I wasn't that bad but almost.) I feel as though my brain is constantly head hopping within itself these days. As though there are a million thoughts all vying for attention at once and whichever shouts the loudest gets its fifteen minutes of fame before the next thought pushes its way to the surface. I know it's a combination of stress, latent decompression from when I was thrust into the position of being "in charge" and the usual cast of characters that run rampant in that vast wasteland also known as my mind. I imagine that this must be something of what folks with ADD put up with on a daily basis. B...

You know, having my mind focused on him has really made it a lot easier to talk to other guys. hehehehehehe (Hey, there's got to be ONE good thing out of this mess, right?)

I love that word. The way it rolls off the tongue. And the confused looks it garners from some, uh, less verbal? people. hehehehe So plethora describes my weekend. As in a plethora of junk. The word "gamut" comes to mind as well. As in, a gamut of emotion. First up, Friday (why do I keep trying to spell it Firday?) night. I was back out at my grandparents house caring for Penny. Turns out Pa-Paw had some complications that have furthered his stay in the hospital. Nothing serious or life threatening, thank God, but enough to keep him from coming home. He was frustrated and irked. He had thought he would get to come home that day. So I was at their house and Pa-Paw calls to check on me. Tells me he had asked a friend of his (a man we go to church with) to drive by at night to make sure I'm okay. I was okay alone at the house. I wasn't okay with this man driving by the house periodically keeping an eye on me. I didn't, of course, tell Pa-Paw that because he thought ...

So Pa-Paw's surgery came out fine. Not without some minor snafu's but thankfully none of them were directly involving the actual surgery itself. Just some incompetence on the part of the staff in having everything ready for it. (Note to anyone in the medical field: It is not cool to jerk an old man around.) But he came through fine. I talked to him on the phone a couple of minutes last night. Or rather he talked and I tried to respond. He didn't have his hearing aid in so he couldn't hear a word I said. lol He was really sweet, though. He just had talk to me, Granny said. He told me that he loved me and appreciated what I was doing for him. That was so sweet. Mama told me this morning that he called their house last night and hounded Daddy to make sure I was safe up there by myself. As though I don't live alone every other day of my life. Grandparents. You gotta love 'em. ;-) So I had a real treat of a day at their house with his dog and mine. His dog Penny, ...

I'm an ungrateful clod. *sigh* I'm offered encouragement at every turn...people do nice things for me and all the while I complain. Silently, of course. Or sometimes not so silently. Or I find some kind of fault or issue with the kindness/encouragement/whatever even if it's just mild annoyance. Take this morning for instance. It was really sweet of Daddy. He not only gave me something for Valentine's Day (unexpectedly) but he also specifically mentioned my favorite place to eat. It was thoughtful. Something that's rare from him where I'm concerned. How was he to know that I'm a pathetic whiney cow? My co-worker pal gave me flowers today and what did I do after I thanked her? I went and griped at Drifters about how she missed the point I'd attempted to make to her when I lectured HER on being ungrateful for the flowers her husband sent her. How was she to know that it isn't the flowers themselves that I coveted but the sweet relationship she shares wi...

You know, as a writer I've often written that phrase in conjunction with a character. "Not wanting him to see the affect his words had on her, she swallowed back her tears." In my life there haven't been very many instances when I've had to do this. I usually let them flow and whoever sees them be hanged. If you've hurt my feelings you deserve to see the waterworks. But this morning...ahh, this morning. Nobody hurt my feelings but for whatever reason I found myself swallowing back those pesky tears just the same. You see, today's Valentine's Day. When I was a kid I looked forward to it because it meant those little heart shaped boxes of cream filled chocolates. You know. Those cheap little boxes with the cartoon characters on the lid? My dad as well as my grandparents always got us girls a box. When I was a teenager it started bothering me a little bit when in high school all the other girls (well, the popular girls. very few of MY friends.) got balloo...

So I was flipping channels last night as I tend to do when I'm bored when what should I see but yet another Larry King special on Anna Nicole Smith. How weird is it that they were making as big a deal out of the Slimfast in her fridge as they were the Methodone? Seriously, the headline at the bottom of the screen read: "Methadone and Slimfast found in Anna Nichole's fridge." So? Minus the Methadone (which I'm not even certain what methadone actually is other than an illegal substance. It's illegal, right?) her fridge isn't all that dissimilar to my own. Slimfast? Check. Butter? Check, check. Expired moldy items? Check, check, check. So does that make the contents of my fridge newsworthy? Well, I guess if I were a surgically enhanced, former Playboy bunny, millionair's widow who's son had recently died under suspicious circumstances as well, it might. I just found the whole thing ridiculous. I mean, they were showing pictures of the refrigerator po...

So, God smacked me on the head and said, "Duh. I gave you what you asked for already. Get on the ball. I'll take care of the rest of it." So waiting worked. I just didn't realize it until I was sitting at my desk near tears earlier. He actually gave it to me this weekend but I've been looking for this one specific thing and when it didn't happen I was so dejected. And that's when He hit me and said, "Look. I gave you the tools. You can recognize these as being from me unlike the others you moaned about last week. Just use what I gave you and worry about the rest of it later." So I am. Thanks, Jesus, for the tools. Next time I'll try to pay better attention.

So it seems you no longer have the option of staying in old Blogger. Not sure I like being FORCED into the new Blogger. Guess I'll deal. Not that I have the choice NOT to...unless I just want to forget Blogger altogether. Which I could, except, I have some friends here that I don't want to leave. And heck, it's not like they forced me to cut off my arm. Just get with the times. But you know, I'm a feet dragger. I hate so-called progress. Sometimes the new isn't always better. And ya'll all know by now how resistant I am to to change. *sigh* Anyway, here I am. Fully Bloggered. So while I'm here I may as well just get on with it, huh? My weekend was good. Dull. But good. I stayed home all day Saturday. Libby and I watched TV. We ate popcorn. We went outside. We took naps. We washed clothes. And that, as they say, is that. Yesterday I went to church and then went back to my folks' house where I watched more TV and talked with the 'rents. And that was th...

I hesitate to say this, lest I jinx myself but... I think the worst of the craziness at work is subsiding. Settling down. Whatever. After three days of a tidal waves it seems the waters are calming. Of course, now that I say that the world will tilt on it's axis and go haywire again. But the good news is that my boss is healing well and might be back to work (light duty) as soon as next week. I told her for her own sake to not rush back. I know from personal experience that just because the doctor says, "you can go back to work now" doesn't always mean you should . I think all doctors should experience some of the things they treat and then try to go back to work when they tell others to and see how well that works out for THEM. Probably not so well. I mean, for MY sake I want her back to work today but....lol I'm struggling a little bit with a "going on faith" thing. My heart knows that He is taking care of this issue for me. My head, on the other hand....

You know, that thing that civilized people do to dispose of their waste in the restroom? Yeah. That flushing. Seriously. You more than likely were not raised by wolves and even if you were, I'm certain at some point in your life you've received instructions on this little deed. If not, let me assist you. Once you've gone potty, turn and face the toilet. To the left there should be a little lever attached to the side of the toilet. Press this little lever down until a swell of water gushes and your "deposit" is whisked away. If said gushing does not happen at first, try again. Wiggle the dang lever if you have to. And should the flush not carry all your waste away the first time, please, by all means FLUSH AGAIN! Trust me. This will not harm the toilet or the lever nor will it harm your little hands or take more than an extra second or two. If this flushing thing is too difficult for you by all means KEEP YOUR FILTH AT HOME. Public restrooms are for EVERYONE. I do ...

And no, I'm not referring to the huge win the Bulldogs had over LSU Saturday night. hehehehe I'm talkin' the Puppy Bowl III, my game of choice this superbowl weekend. hehehehehe Those puppies are darn sight more fun to watch than a bunch of overgrown boys in tights chasin' after a pigskin, let me tell you. These pups had attitude, valor and more "personal fouls" (aka, poopy incidents) than you'll ever see at a football game. Besides, you could take one of these little fellas home and not have to wonder if he'll call the next day. hehehehehe So yeah. Me and the Devil Pup watched the Puppy Bowl on Animal Planet. It actually was pretty cute to watch a bunch of puppies be naturally sweet and funny. My favorite part was the lab mix puppy who dug all the water out of the bowl and then laid on top of the water bowl! Or the bulldog who hid behind the goal post most of the time. But I've gotten ahead of myself. Let's start from when I left work Saturday...

Hi. I'm Jana. I'm a frozen delight. Well, not really a delight, but frozen, nontheless. It's friggen COLD in here. And yes. I'm at work. Boo. lol I gots some good news, though. As of this morning I've officially lost 39lbs!!! Wa hooooo! For weeks upon weeks I was stuck on the 35lb mark. Fluctuated, actually but it never dipped below it until late last week, I think. And then I gained over last weekend. But this week, this week the pounds have been moving away. Thank you, Jesus! :-) I also got some bad news. Sis2's got the stomach virus. She was supposed to come into town today to do some maternity clothes and baby furniture shopping but ended up sick last night. She and Goofus had b-ball tickets to the game tonight, too. She's totally bummed, as I am. It's bad enough when you're sick like that but when it messes up your fun plans, it sucks monkey butt. Not much else going on. The student worker who's working with me today asked me for relationshi...

You know, when I was a kid, I used to start off every prayer with that. "God is great, God is good." I never fully understood back then that truer words had never been spoken. It is amazing, the wonderful awesomeness of God. The true faithfulness and love of His son Jesus. I don't know why, but every time He blesses me, answers a prayer or generally shows His infinite power it amazes me. He blesses my life, takes care of me, sees me through all the struggles that life has to offer and protects me from my own human frailties (also known as idiocy.) I don't always give Him the praise, honor and glory He deserves and yet He is always faithful to me. So give me a moment to bear witness. Yesterday I was having a real crisis day due to a stupid mistake I'd made on a credit card payment. Okay, just so you can fully appreciate the enormity of my goof, what happened was, I paid this particular bill on-line (hello, Mr. Mastercard.) on the 23rd, a couple days before it was d...