CAUTION: Woman In Progress

So I don't think I ever told you my Naked and Embarrassed story, did I? I probably shouldn't. I should be wise and keep it to myself because that's what mature adult type people do, right? But since I'm not mature... Soooo, this was, like, the Saturday before Fadda's Dae. (Don't ask me why I spell it like that. I don't know why. I just do.) I was in the mad dash cleaning and baking phase and, you know, it gets hot in the house when the oven is on and a girl is running around like a lunatic. Weeeeeeelllll...sometime Saturday afternoon, once all the baking was done, the kitchen cleaned up and all the other cleaning type nonsense finished or abandoned (probably abandoned) I stripped down to my underwear and sprawled out in the recliner to rest and let the ceiling fan do it's magical cooling off thing. And in the nature of full disclosure, about ten minutes into the cooling off period I also stripped off my sports bra. Because boob sweat, ya'll. Do...

So on that mixed bag of nuts called Facebook there are often several meme's with some alliteration of a photo/drawing of who one can only assume is supposed to be Jesus with the following sentiment scrawled over it: "Stop scrolling and share if you love Jesus. He died for you and if you deny Him before the world He will deny you." I see some version or another of that at least fifty times a day on my newsfeed. And ya'll know I ain't got nothing against Jesus. He's the only thing that keeps me going, right? But that meme? Drives. Me. Nuts. Because it's like accusing you of not REALLY loving Jesus if you don't share/like every one of those memes that you come across. Because that's how you get the Word out to a lost and dying world, right? By SHAMING people? Ugh. Correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't Jesus die to remove our shame? I'm so tempted to post the following status update but hesitate for fear that all my Jesus loving friends a...

The DP is considering running for president of the world. I figure she'd do as good a job as anyone, especially since she doesn't take any crap offa anyone, can spell "home" and would rather play, eat and sleep than deal with people. Like most politicians. But without all the lying. Would I lie to you? We're still working on her foreign policies (she wants to ban China from all foreign trade because they poison dog treats...I keep telling her not to pick a fight with the Chinese) but she  has  already decided on her platform. "I, Libby Lu Hill, make this promise to my people...I will completely overhaul the Milkbone program. Milkbones will be made available to pups from all economic statuses. There will be no pups left behind." I'm sure the world will be thrilled. Besides, who wouldn't vote for this face? I will chew your face off if you don't vote for me. She thought briefly of asking Milo to run along with her as Vice-Pr...

The library finally upgraded our office tools to 2013. We had a workshop this morning to go over some of the changes that we might find useful in the new Word, Excel, etc. versions and were then told to go play around with it in case we came across anything we needed help with or had questions about. I don't use Excel except in the most basic way so I really don't know how to play around in it. But I do use Word quite a bit so I've been having fun learning all the new features and junk. And also, I've been enjoying having permission to play for a little while this afternoon. The photo is mine, one that I took a few months ago. The quote, I got from a website of inspirational quotes. I created the text on the photo and border in Word and then used the snipping tool from the window's accessories to lift it from Word and save it as a jPeg. All this to warn you, you may be seeing a lot of these from now on. :-D

So, as I mentioned earlier, I had a lunch date with my friends E and A. (Or A and E although that sounds like a cable network.) It was free tea day at a local deli so we went, ordered sandwiches and sweet tea (because sweet is the only way to drink tea, or didn't you now that?) and sat down. Everything's great. We're eating, swapping funny stories. I'm mostly over my snit with A since venting this morning. All's well and fun. Then the waitress comes over and asks if we'd like refills on our tea. So this is the kind of place where they hafta take your glass with them to refill instead of having a pitcher with them to re-fill your cups at the table. There are three of us at the table so the waitress takes A's cup and brings it back then take E's cup and refills. And then she just...she LEAVES. Without my cup.  I had even picked it up to hand it to her and she just walked away . Apparently the expression on my face was pretty hilarious because A and E fel...

So apparently I only know how to photobomb with my tongue out? Anyway, this was taken at my birthday "party" a few weeks ago. Mama is just now getting the pictures to me, which, really for it to have been  my party, there are so very few photos of me in there. What's up with that ? Huh, Ma? Oh, and sorry it's blurry. Mama only takes photos with her iPhone now and blurry seems to be its MO. iPhone's are ruining photography. But we'll always have photobombs.

So. Trix and I were talking about Christmas songs earlier and I mentioned that I have the warm and fuzzies for Elvis's Blue Christmas . Just Elvis's version of the song, though. It has to be Elvis. Unless it's Porky Pig. This is where Trix informs me that she has not had the delightful opportunity to indulge in such a pleasure as listening to Porky Pig sing Blue Christmas . So Trixie! This one's for you! :-D Enjoy!

I think my student assistant just told me that he is surprised that I've actually been working . Not sure how I feel about that. :-D I DO actually work when at work, FYI. Usually . Just sometimes some projects get put on the back burner because of reasons and some of the tasks I really dislike doing *cough*reading newspapers*cough* get sort of a little not done as quickly as it could be. Even doing it daily, sometimes, yeah, I drag my feet on the newspapers in favor of other things. What he REALLY probably meant was, "Thank you for giving ME more work to do" (sarcastically of course) since my recent dedication to getting those stupid newspapers read and checked directly co-relates to him having more newspapers to clip, photocopy, label and file which means HE has less time to goof off. I was an evil genius and didn't even know it. haha I was merely trying to get a leg up on cleaning out the newspaper closet since those dag-blasted things multiply like rabbit...

Today's Lesson: When God tells you to walk a little bit further and go in the front door of your building instead of the door you're headed to, LISTEN TO HIM. Because if you don't--if you ignore Him--inevitably, you're going to walk right into one of the people you wanted to avoid on your afternoon stroll. *face palm* I can almost hear Him laughing at me right now.

Okay ya'll. Go read this and then come back for my comments on it. Because I would never actually LEAVE a comment on her actual BLOG that was less than flattering because, hello. I'm a nice girl. So I'm going to bash this recipe behind her back. Because that's much nicer than harshing on it to her face and A) hurting her feelings and B) getting completely flamed by her loyal followers/fans who all want to marry her. Let me get this outta the way, first. I love Jess and How Sweet It Is. I really, truly do. She's, like, HILARIOUS and brilliant in the kitchen...usually and if not for this one thing we would probably be, like, BFF's in real life if we ever actually met. I read her blog every day because it, like, sweetens my soul. Or something. That's why I can't ever bash any of her recipe's on her blog because I respect her and wouldn't want to hurt her feelings. But...this has to be said somewhere because this sort of insanity is all over ...

Sis1 finally got a facebook account. And I am in hell. *le sigh* For the past TWO DAYS, ya'll, she's been emailing me with questions about how does it work and how do you get to what and whatever. Then today she's been emailing me with questions about the things she's learning about our family members because she's been going through their profile pages and junk and she's all, "When did so and so happen?" And, "When did whatsherface have a baby?" She was griping because apparently nobody ever tells her anything and I said, "Now you can get the family news the same way everyone else does--On FACEBOOK." :-D

 E, L, Me, A and DD  Do I have the most beautiful and wacky cool friends in all the land or what? :-D We were mugging for the wacky photobooth Friday at Staff Appreciation Day (SAD)...the one day each year all the staff all over campus get free food, fun and a couple or three (sometimes four) hours to chillax and be total goofs. This pic ended up on the university's website as well as the their facebook page. So we're, like, totes famous now. Also? I so wanted to take my hat home with me. Wonder where I can find one? Also, also? I hope nobody at staff day had lice...because then we'd ALL have it. And another also? I don't think very many fellas went for the photobooth. Dudes are so lame. And one last also? I want one of these photobooths at my house. Just because.

So this week has been an odd one, too.  Not as weird as last week, but just still not quite the same-ol', same-ol'. For one thing, I got a visit all the way from Japan! My friend L, who moved to Japan after graduation last year and has been teaching over there, has been home for a visit for about a week. She finally got around to eating with the ol' gang from work. Even Mrs. B came to lunch. It was like American Reunion up in here. Except with less vulgarity. And almost no nudity. L is almost full on Japanese now and I wish I had taken a picture of her at lunch Wednesday...she looked like a tiny white Anime girl. Seriously. She's got the Anime/Manga fashion DOWN. And she's tiny. Ergo, tiny Anime girl. When we were setting up our lunch date we told her she could pick the place. She came aaaaalllllll the way from Japan to eat Chinese, ya'll. And she ate with chopsticks. Show off . Seriously. Use a fork, tiny Anime girl. This is AMERICA. But s...

So, I don't know if my house is haunted or my VCR/DVD combo thingy is going nuts. Either way, it's kinda freaky when TWICE the previously unset clock on the VCR/DVD combo has been set and I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I did not set it. I haven't actually set the clock on the blasted thing in YEARS because every time I set it, the power goes out and unsets it.  The numbers are so small I can't read it from any point in the room other than with my face mere inches away, anyway. The process of re-setting it is more trouble than it's worth. A few weeks ago, though, I noticed that instead of the --:-- it usually sports when the unit is off, it was sporting numbers. Granted, the time it was set for was ten hours behind the actual time, but how did the numbers get there to begin with? Unless Libby's grown some opposable thumbs (Trixie, is that right? opposable?? Spell check on here says no.) and taken an interest in technology. One might suspect...

Okay. So. Question. Why do guys (especially cute ones) seem to always feel the need to let me know "oh so casually" that they have girlfriends? What, because I'm friendly, helpful and ringless they think I'm gonna drag them off into the stacks and have my wicked way with them unless they let me know they're already taken? Seriously? Yes, this happened to me this morning but it's happened I can't tell you how many times recently. Maybe I'm giving off some sort of "I want you" vibe to all the hotties coming in.  Even so, good grief! Is it really necessary to let me know they're unavailable? Really? Sure, because I'm totally going to try to seduce them during the half hour they're doing research in our reading room. Of course. Also, I smile a lot. It's in the job description. If I were surly, they'd surely take offence to that, right? So. Do I just look desperate? Or maybe they think my smile is a declaration of intent to...

So. Ya'll remember that cold that was stopping me up the other day? Yeah. It's still hanging around. And while the cold itself isn't all that miserable (yet) the meds I'm taking to kick it to the curb are kicking MY butt. Nyquil and Dayquil, while I loveth thee more than any other cold medicine, thou art totally kickething my butt like, woah! I'm all...  source  I really probably shoulda oughtta stayed at home today and like, you know, slept it off. But, well, I'm a martyr. And also it's kinda a pain to call in sick since my former supervisor retired. I have to call TWO people now and, well, I don't like phones.   Which is dumb because it's like I'd rather come to work half drunk on Nyquil and pass out at the reference desk (which I totally didn't do and you can't prove otherwise) instead of just sucking it up and just using the dag-gum phone. But also again, I get to mope around the office and show off my pitfifullness so...

So, ya'll know I'm not terribly brilliant, right? If for some reason you're not 100% certain, let me help you out there. Okay, so I have had these two ant beds near my carport for a couple of weeks. One is long and narrow and pressed right up against the carport and the other is a smaller round bed situated just slightly away from the carport. I've been looking at these things for a couple of weeks thinking to myself that I really needed to get the stuff out and kill them. You know, I hate to be a murderess but nobody needs two (or any!) ant beds that close to the house. Besides, the Devil Pup had just about walked through both of them at various times because they're sort of flat on the ground instead of built up. And heck, I've nearly walked through one of them! But for some reason (laziness) I just never did get to killing. Apparently I'm a failure at murder. And no, this isn't a tale of me reaping my laziness by walking through one and getting e...

Mama, as you know, went to Uncle Don's memorial service in the Delta yesterday. As we drove to work this morning, she told me of all her cousins who were there who she had not seen since many of them were babies or young children. It was a joyful reunion, of sorts. As she was relaying individual stories of each of them she came to one, who's name escapes me now, who she said is a "Jana." So I'm apparently an adjective now. But whatever. When she said this, I thought, Okay. That could mean anything. Emmy is compared to me because she has my sass. Lyssa is compared to me because she has my craziness and creativity. Ethan is compared to me because he likes to eat. A lot. So this cousin of my mother's, I wondered, in what way is she a "Jana"? Turns out it's our inability to find mates, penchant to live near (or with, in the cousin's case) our parents, read and be morbidly obese that we have in common. Mama said, (And this is a direct qu...

This may be one of those stories where ya just had to be there and ya'll won't find it funny at all. It is kinda lame. But Daddy and Sis2 thought it was hilarious. Then again, it does involve me behaving foolishly so there is that to consider. Anyway, Saturday morning was rather interesting. After shopping and breakfast I got busy doing laundry and cleaning and stuff. (No, that isn't the interesting part.) All of a sudden the smoke alarm started going off in short bursts. Nothing was on fire and it's done this before so I wasn't concerned--just annoyed. While it's wired into the house, I think the battery back-up is dying. I can't figure out how to get the cover off of it to see if it even HAS battery back-up, though. So it did that a few times over a five minute period and stopped. A little while later I was deep in the midst of rearranging furniture (this is what I do when I'm restless) when it started going off again. This time in longer bursts. ...

I love, love, LOVE that Emmy and Lyssa get along so well. With such a huge age difference between them, it could've gone either way. But even though one is nearly four and the other is nearly twelve, they get along like BFF's. It sort of reminds me of the relationship I had with my aunt, Mary, who is 8 years older than me. Emmy's so patient with her and they adore each other. I don't know that Aunt Mary adored me, but she was always patient with me and I followed her around like a puppy whenever she came to visit--much like Lyssa does with Emmy. And you know Emmy adores Lyssa because see that picture up there?? She's letting Lyssa play a game on her iPod touch--the iPod touch she saved her allowance, birthday money and did odd jobs for (for family friends) for MONTHS to buy herself. I think her parents only had to contribute like the last twenty dollars for it and they did so because she'd been so diligent in saving for it. That, and she's such a good ...