Celebrity Craziness

Lord help me but yeah, I read MSN's Entertainment gossip and news. I'm a dork. But you know what? I'm sort of sick of celebrities. They can't take responsibility for their own stupidity (See Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan and most recently Isaiah Washington), they're rude and ugly behaved (see the newest gossip on Justin "Icky" Timberlake) (Sorry to all the Timberlake fans out there but he's just gross. Always has been.), apparently they're all a bunch of lushes with nothing better to do than accumulate DUI's (PH, LiLo and most recently Eve) and embarrassing interview footage. (John Stamos anyone?) Oh yeah, and they have more mugshots between 'em than the entire state of Mississippi. And they call US trashy redneck hillbillies. Most redneck hillbillies have ten times the manners and integrity of these so-called celebrities.

Does fame just do something wonky to your brain? Turn you stupid, mean and drunk? Do you lose all sense of self-respect and respect for others once someone other than your mama thinks you're the cat's meow? Seriously. Get a life.

I know it must be SO HARD staying sober and polite when your face is plastered everywhere and you're sitting on a wad of cash bigger than Mt. Rushmore. It isn't like you can't afford to PAY A DRIVER when you're drunk off your gourde or use some common sense. You know, common sense like, if you feel the need to get smashed, DON'T DO SO THE NIGHT BEFORE A TELEVISION INTERVIEW and for goodness sake DON'T DRIVE. I mean, come on. Most of you have been in the spotlight long enough to know that film haunts you forever and so does a DUI. So be a good kid, get smashed in the privacy of your mansion (or beach house in Malibu) and sleep it off before going out in public.

Mr. Timberlake, I realize it can't be easy being hounded by the paparazzi 24/7 but that does not give you the right to go around speaking to them with idiot four letter words or making vicious threats to them. Stop behaving like a 12-year-old boy who didn't get the video game he wanted for his birthday. You're technically an adult. So act like one. And yeah, I know they're pond scum. But they're still human pond scum just trying to make a living at a job they love. Same as you. As for how you've been reported treating your fans, this is unacceptable. These are the people who put you where you are. They MADE your career. I don't care how talented you are. If you don't have an audience who wants to hear you, you ain't goin' nowhere. So treat them with the respect and common decency they deserve. You do NOT make rude comments to them, treat them shabbily or tell them to go screw themselves. (and I'm paraphrasing here.) And by George, if they are kind enough to ASK to take your photograph, you darn well better just grit your teeth and kindly agree. And if you for some reason just don't want your photograph taken, at least be polite in your refusal. Do not behave like a crankypants arrogant SOB because, dude, there'll come a day when nobody but your mom'll want to take your picture. And then only because she's your mom and she loves you.

And I'm sorry, Mr. Washington. Any number of common people, be they black or white, red or yellow would have gotten fired immediately for the type of behavior you exhibited on the job. And yes, while the set of Grey's Anatomy might feel more like a vacation compared to say, working in a steel mill or as a road crew for the department of transportation (both of which I imagine to be really grueling hard working jobs...like, break a sweat and go home exhausted jobs) it is indeed your job. You should have more respect for your co-workers and yourself than to behave in such a manner. And while we're at it, dude, if the person you made an anti-gay comment about had in turn used a racial slur against YOU you'd have been satisfied to see his butt fired immediately. So don't go blaming racism on this one. Be a man. Take responsibility for your actions and stop blaming everyone else for something you did to yourself. It only makes you seem pathetic and weak to foist blame onto others and even more so, to blame your race. Not to say that racism doesn't still exist but judging by how boorish, childish and petty you've acted in recent months, it's quite obvious to me that your race isn't the problem people have with you. No one wants to be around confrontational mean-spirited a-holes.

And Mr. Stamos. Oh gosh, how I once loved thee. But man, it's bad enough to appear intoxicated on home soil but to go on Australian television that way? Dude. That is SO not cool. Yeah, yeah, I know. You were jet lagged. Well, all I gotta say is, if you were that bad off you shoulda stayed in bed. Period. Reschedule until you can talk without a slur and hold your hand steady enough to shave and, you know, brush your hair. You do not stumble onto a television set in a foreign country looking like something the cat wouldn't deign to drag in and then proceed to slur and mumble stupidly through an interview. Got it? Good.

I won't give PH or LiLo the time it takes to rant but I will say this. You both need to GROW THE HECK UP.

Now. I feel much better. How 'bout you?

And hey, if you're wondering what inspired these rants just check out today's MSN's homepage in the entertainment section. But be prepared. It isn't pretty.