Reminisce
When I first started my job as a library staff, I was a fresh faced twenty-two year old who had just obtained a BA in Communication. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life upon graduation--no goals or ambition--and I was pretty certain that my timidity would do little toward securing me a job in the Broadcasting field in which I was so newly educated.
What I did know was that I liked working at the library. I'd worked there through the entire four years of college as a student assistant in Acquisitions. After the first couple of years I'd begun receiving staff tasks and duties (because the staff I worked with weren't terribly productive) and this gave me such a huge sense of belonging. I loved my job in Acquisitions. I loved the flow of it, the pace--I even grew to be comfortable speaking with book vendors and billing agencies.
What I also knew was that I wanted to move out of the folk's house. After twenty-two years of being smothered, I'd had enough. I needed some freedom and space. Some room to grow and grow up.
So, when a full time staff position opened at a different department of the library, I tossed my application in the ring, crossed my fingers and prayed a lot. Fortunately, the awesome lady I worked under as a student assistant adored me and gave me such a glowing review that after I was hired, my new boss informed me that she had high expectations for me. Pressure much?
And so I settled into the bliss of full time employment and realized quickly that my new job wasn't anything like my student assistant job...very little respect, very little freedom and little to no room to show my creativity. I was, I guess you could say, micromanaged a bit. Something I wasn't terribly used to.
But this job also came with some huge benefits I hadn't expected...FRIENDS!
You might recall that Mama also works at this same library--and has since I was in about the fourth or fifth grade. I basically grew up in this library. I knew most of her friends, I knew all the good hiding spots, where all the good books were and where all the snacks were hidden. And though I knew a lot of people from both my childhood and my time spent as a student assistant, I didn't really know anyone. My work friends had always been fellow student assistants.
When I was thrust into a staff position, at the time, I was the youngest staff on the books. My immediate co-workers were in their late thirties and upwards. Some as old as fifty-five!! (Which to me, back then at twenty-two, was super amazingly OLD! hehehe) Needless to say, I had very few expectations of becoming friends with anyone. I was a tiny little goldfish among whales. Everyone was so intimidatingly know-y. I was...well, I was embarrassingly ignorant.
And then, almost magically, something started happening...I started becoming friends with my co-workers! The first two people to adopt me into the fold were Mrs. B (you've heard me talk about her before.) and Bren. (I think I've talked about her before, too. Long time ago.) Mrs. B was in her fifties and Bren was in her late thirties but I discovered that I could talk to them about anything. About stuff BFF wouldn't get. Stuff my family would laugh at me for. It was the most awesome thing. Soon we were taking breaks together, commiserating about work issues, griping about men and families and all the things that good friends commiserate about. And occasionally we'd go out for supper or drinks after work. I'd never had friendships like that before.
Back in those early days, I used to take an hour for lunch. At first, it was mostly just me and my mom in the lounge. We'd eat and watch the news and Bold and the Beautiful on this tiny little 13 inch black and white tv. Then slowly but surely a handful of others started trickling in. Two of them were men that I worked with in my department. It was a lot of fun watching the soap opera, making fun of it, making predictions on who Brook would marry next or if Ridge would one day father his own great grandson. We had an informal club that bonded over news and Bold and the Beautiful.
And then slowly, but surely, Mrs. B, Bren and I started collecting break friends. Craig, one of my lunch buddies, a couple of student assistants and occasionally other folks from around the library. Back then we took our breaks in the open area snack shop on the second floor of the library. Our regular table was by the window and near the counter and everyone who came through the snack shop could see us. On a few occasions people we didn't even really know but who had seen us on a daily basis would either stop and chat with us or join us for our break.
For about the first six or so years at this job, this was my life. A huge group of friends, an informal lunch club, supper or drinks after work. It was the most active social life I'd ever had. My folks were super over protective when I lived with them and so friends and nights out were practically non-existent. Even bff, who I've been friends with since 10th grade, never asked me to go out with her and her other friends because she knew how my parents were.
So this new life was a novelty for me. A strange but beautiful novelty.
But then things started to change. First I began taking a thirty minute lunch in order to leave at 4--shrinking my time with the lunch crew and eliminating B&B from my life. Then Bren's health took a dire turn and she retired early and went on disability. Shortly after that Craig went up for tenure and didn't get it so he had to find a new job. THEN the open area snack shop was renovated, enclose and switched over to a bagel shop (bagels...yum!) and was priced right out of our range so Mrs. B and I moved our breaks to the staff lounge where we saw no one and no one saw us. Suddenly we went from this huge fun group of friends to two of us hiding out in the basement lounge. Then the lunch club broke up altogether and for the longest time it was again, just Mama and me, watching the news on a new 27 inch color tv while we ate.
Slowly we've begun gaining new friends and I enjoy my new co-workers who've come into our department since then. And I've made a couple of new friends in the library who I occasionally enjoy supper and a movie with.
But I miss the old days. I miss snarking with Mike and Craig about Brook and Ridge's almost incestuous relationship. I miss talking boys with Bren and benefiting from her infinite wisdom. I miss supper and drinks after work and belonging to something that just came together so naturally. And though I am infinitely grateful to still count Mrs. B as a treasured friend and confidant, I fear that she's nearing retirement and soon she too will be lost to me.
But so it is, this ebb and flow of life. It is a constant change. And it's nice to be able to look back and appreciate it all with a glad heart for having had that wonderful period of my life.
What I did know was that I liked working at the library. I'd worked there through the entire four years of college as a student assistant in Acquisitions. After the first couple of years I'd begun receiving staff tasks and duties (because the staff I worked with weren't terribly productive) and this gave me such a huge sense of belonging. I loved my job in Acquisitions. I loved the flow of it, the pace--I even grew to be comfortable speaking with book vendors and billing agencies.
What I also knew was that I wanted to move out of the folk's house. After twenty-two years of being smothered, I'd had enough. I needed some freedom and space. Some room to grow and grow up.
So, when a full time staff position opened at a different department of the library, I tossed my application in the ring, crossed my fingers and prayed a lot. Fortunately, the awesome lady I worked under as a student assistant adored me and gave me such a glowing review that after I was hired, my new boss informed me that she had high expectations for me. Pressure much?
And so I settled into the bliss of full time employment and realized quickly that my new job wasn't anything like my student assistant job...very little respect, very little freedom and little to no room to show my creativity. I was, I guess you could say, micromanaged a bit. Something I wasn't terribly used to.
But this job also came with some huge benefits I hadn't expected...FRIENDS!
You might recall that Mama also works at this same library--and has since I was in about the fourth or fifth grade. I basically grew up in this library. I knew most of her friends, I knew all the good hiding spots, where all the good books were and where all the snacks were hidden. And though I knew a lot of people from both my childhood and my time spent as a student assistant, I didn't really know anyone. My work friends had always been fellow student assistants.
When I was thrust into a staff position, at the time, I was the youngest staff on the books. My immediate co-workers were in their late thirties and upwards. Some as old as fifty-five!! (Which to me, back then at twenty-two, was super amazingly OLD! hehehe) Needless to say, I had very few expectations of becoming friends with anyone. I was a tiny little goldfish among whales. Everyone was so intimidatingly know-y. I was...well, I was embarrassingly ignorant.
And then, almost magically, something started happening...I started becoming friends with my co-workers! The first two people to adopt me into the fold were Mrs. B (you've heard me talk about her before.) and Bren. (I think I've talked about her before, too. Long time ago.) Mrs. B was in her fifties and Bren was in her late thirties but I discovered that I could talk to them about anything. About stuff BFF wouldn't get. Stuff my family would laugh at me for. It was the most awesome thing. Soon we were taking breaks together, commiserating about work issues, griping about men and families and all the things that good friends commiserate about. And occasionally we'd go out for supper or drinks after work. I'd never had friendships like that before.
Back in those early days, I used to take an hour for lunch. At first, it was mostly just me and my mom in the lounge. We'd eat and watch the news and Bold and the Beautiful on this tiny little 13 inch black and white tv. Then slowly but surely a handful of others started trickling in. Two of them were men that I worked with in my department. It was a lot of fun watching the soap opera, making fun of it, making predictions on who Brook would marry next or if Ridge would one day father his own great grandson. We had an informal club that bonded over news and Bold and the Beautiful.
And then slowly, but surely, Mrs. B, Bren and I started collecting break friends. Craig, one of my lunch buddies, a couple of student assistants and occasionally other folks from around the library. Back then we took our breaks in the open area snack shop on the second floor of the library. Our regular table was by the window and near the counter and everyone who came through the snack shop could see us. On a few occasions people we didn't even really know but who had seen us on a daily basis would either stop and chat with us or join us for our break.
For about the first six or so years at this job, this was my life. A huge group of friends, an informal lunch club, supper or drinks after work. It was the most active social life I'd ever had. My folks were super over protective when I lived with them and so friends and nights out were practically non-existent. Even bff, who I've been friends with since 10th grade, never asked me to go out with her and her other friends because she knew how my parents were.
So this new life was a novelty for me. A strange but beautiful novelty.
But then things started to change. First I began taking a thirty minute lunch in order to leave at 4--shrinking my time with the lunch crew and eliminating B&B from my life. Then Bren's health took a dire turn and she retired early and went on disability. Shortly after that Craig went up for tenure and didn't get it so he had to find a new job. THEN the open area snack shop was renovated, enclose and switched over to a bagel shop (bagels...yum!) and was priced right out of our range so Mrs. B and I moved our breaks to the staff lounge where we saw no one and no one saw us. Suddenly we went from this huge fun group of friends to two of us hiding out in the basement lounge. Then the lunch club broke up altogether and for the longest time it was again, just Mama and me, watching the news on a new 27 inch color tv while we ate.
Slowly we've begun gaining new friends and I enjoy my new co-workers who've come into our department since then. And I've made a couple of new friends in the library who I occasionally enjoy supper and a movie with.
But I miss the old days. I miss snarking with Mike and Craig about Brook and Ridge's almost incestuous relationship. I miss talking boys with Bren and benefiting from her infinite wisdom. I miss supper and drinks after work and belonging to something that just came together so naturally. And though I am infinitely grateful to still count Mrs. B as a treasured friend and confidant, I fear that she's nearing retirement and soon she too will be lost to me.
But so it is, this ebb and flow of life. It is a constant change. And it's nice to be able to look back and appreciate it all with a glad heart for having had that wonderful period of my life.
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