2012 Goals Update: June
Ya'll, I've been putting this off because, well, June kicked my goals' butts and sent them cryin' to their mama. June was fun, but June was the month it all fell apart.
Health and Wellness:
While waiting for my knee to get back to pre-injury aerobic walking condition, I had taken to strolling around campus in the afternoons. In June, that habit bit the dust. It was too dang hot and just am not into sweating. Because of this--and my stellar lack of self control--I regained every. stinking. pound. that it had taken me four months to lose.
Yep, folks. I'm officially back to my January starting weight. Well, maybe three pounds away from it. I can't remember exactly what my starting weight was back in January but this is pretty close.
I really let my hair down in June. I quit counting calories. I ceased all forms of exercise--I didn't even DANCE in June. What the fluff? And I basically just gave up, I think. Even though I told myself I hadn't, in reality, I had. I was so danged discouraged by the wonky knee business and so tired of THINKING all the time that I just let it all go. I ate what I wanted to when I wanted to. I baked. I ate out. I bought junk food. And I reconciled it all under the umbrella justification of "I deserve to enjoy this."
Which is a lie I've told myself my whole lie.
And as is prone to do, all my other goals went down the toilet, too.
Financial:
I spent every dime I made and then some. I charged $218 worth of crap. Part of it, sure, was the week Emmy was with me when we went out to eat, to the movies, to paint pottery, etc. But a bigger part of it was just me thinking, "I deserve to enjoy this. Screw the consequences." So. Yeah. Not good. I cut my big Visa payment in half in order to use some of that money to pay off the other card I'd abused.
I did manage to not touch my savings, though I don't really know that that matters much at this point.
Spiritual goals:
While I have been upkeeping my daily independent Bible study, I haven't been to an evening service since...May? I think? For one thing, evening services got cancelled a lot in May so I sort of got out of the habit. And I got lazy. And then when I determined to go back, Mr. Bud died and going back seems harder than ever because he was sort of my lifeline during evening services. He made an awkward girl feel almost comfortable and he was always awesome at pulling me out of my shell. Going back without him there? Hard to think about.
But I can't blame Mr. Bud for my failings. The sad truth is, it's just easier not to go to evening services. Period. But I'm pretty sure Jesus did a lot of things he was uncomfortable with. He didn't not preach the sermon on the mount because he was feeling shy. He just got out there and did it! And so, too, must I. Spoiler alert: I haven't yet. But I will.
Overall wrap up:
June was brutal but it was also a wake-up call that I needed to pay attention and get back to work. I can't let everything slide just because my wonky knees aren't feelin' the love. Life is so much bigger than wonky knees, shyness and mild depression. Life is for living and living ain't easy.
But the best things in life never ARE easy, now are they?
So. Onward and upward into the second half of 2012.
Health and Wellness:
While waiting for my knee to get back to pre-injury aerobic walking condition, I had taken to strolling around campus in the afternoons. In June, that habit bit the dust. It was too dang hot and just am not into sweating. Because of this--and my stellar lack of self control--I regained every. stinking. pound. that it had taken me four months to lose.
Yep, folks. I'm officially back to my January starting weight. Well, maybe three pounds away from it. I can't remember exactly what my starting weight was back in January but this is pretty close.
I really let my hair down in June. I quit counting calories. I ceased all forms of exercise--I didn't even DANCE in June. What the fluff? And I basically just gave up, I think. Even though I told myself I hadn't, in reality, I had. I was so danged discouraged by the wonky knee business and so tired of THINKING all the time that I just let it all go. I ate what I wanted to when I wanted to. I baked. I ate out. I bought junk food. And I reconciled it all under the umbrella justification of "I deserve to enjoy this."
Which is a lie I've told myself my whole lie.
And as is prone to do, all my other goals went down the toilet, too.
Financial:
I spent every dime I made and then some. I charged $218 worth of crap. Part of it, sure, was the week Emmy was with me when we went out to eat, to the movies, to paint pottery, etc. But a bigger part of it was just me thinking, "I deserve to enjoy this. Screw the consequences." So. Yeah. Not good. I cut my big Visa payment in half in order to use some of that money to pay off the other card I'd abused.
I did manage to not touch my savings, though I don't really know that that matters much at this point.
Spiritual goals:
While I have been upkeeping my daily independent Bible study, I haven't been to an evening service since...May? I think? For one thing, evening services got cancelled a lot in May so I sort of got out of the habit. And I got lazy. And then when I determined to go back, Mr. Bud died and going back seems harder than ever because he was sort of my lifeline during evening services. He made an awkward girl feel almost comfortable and he was always awesome at pulling me out of my shell. Going back without him there? Hard to think about.
But I can't blame Mr. Bud for my failings. The sad truth is, it's just easier not to go to evening services. Period. But I'm pretty sure Jesus did a lot of things he was uncomfortable with. He didn't not preach the sermon on the mount because he was feeling shy. He just got out there and did it! And so, too, must I. Spoiler alert: I haven't yet. But I will.
Overall wrap up:
June was brutal but it was also a wake-up call that I needed to pay attention and get back to work. I can't let everything slide just because my wonky knees aren't feelin' the love. Life is so much bigger than wonky knees, shyness and mild depression. Life is for living and living ain't easy.
But the best things in life never ARE easy, now are they?
So. Onward and upward into the second half of 2012.
Comments
And, like you, I hate walking in 90+ temps, and we've had three days over 100. Which is not normal for us. Zaps your energy just thinking about it, lol. They were going for a high of 101F today, but we seem to beholding at 98 for the time being. Yeah, like three stinkin' degrees makes much difference at these temps.
Anyway, I was just thinking to myself last night that I have been buying way too much junk food lately--which really is not normal for me. Chocolate for work, yes. Occasional container of ice cream in summer, yes.
But cookies, HoHo's and chips? Not normal. Okay, so I did get some yogurt last weekend, and I bought some fruit cups to take to work and Concerts on the Square. And although I did succumb and buy a pie when they were on sale a few weeks ago (hello! $3 for an 8" pie!), it was blackberry, which is totally good for you...right?
Hmmm...
Can you try some floor exercises or an easier, slower walking to work your knee back into it? Don't push it.